I've been a bad blogger and I didn't think that I had anything to blog about until I went to the school parent's association meeting this week. I know schools are strapped for cash and for whatever reason people (ok, educators really, which probably explains why this is an issue) are all up in arms about the educational system in the US, but the way that educators are trying to change things is just wrong. It is obvious that these so called educators are really just PhD's with an inflated sense of themselves (and I can say this because I have a PhD myself) and who have no real world experience with either teaching or with kids. Most of these people are either so old that they are out of touch with what children are like, or they are just out of school with no world experience and no kids of their own. Both of these scenarios are just disasters waiting to happen.
So, what has gotten me thinking about all this. Well, the attempted cancellation of the Halloween parade at my son's school. The teachers and staff apparently talked among themselves and voted to cancel the annual parade on the grounds that most kids don't care about it anyway (this coming mostly from 4th and 5th grade teachers). Then, the younger grade teachers voiced their opinion and they rescheduled it for after school. Now we hear that they are revisiting that and that a couple of parents object to Halloween so they are considering canceling the parade again. Well, let me tell you, the parents association today let the principal and teachers rep know that this was not an option, that we want the parade, that we were mad that this all went down behind our backs, and I think they got the picture that this type of thing better not happen again. Case closed!
Next issue, the belief that educators have that being in school sitting at a desk is the be all and end all of education. The principal went so far as to say send your sick kid to school because we need the money we get for them being in school (and getting all the other kids sick). Not only that, she was upset that parents (gasp!) take their kids out of school (and jump through the stupid hoops to set up an independent study so the school can still get its money) to take family vacations. She even said that it was more educational and important to be sitting in school than to be out seeing how our country works (taking a trip to Washington D.C. and seeing Congress in action, visiting historic battle sites in Virginia, etc) or seeing how other cultures and countries differ from our own (yeah, it's much better to learn about this from a book and a teacher who has probably never been to India or France or Germany). I think all the parents in the meeting were dumbfounded. We didn't know what to say.
These are just a few examples of how our educational system is deteriorating. Since when did we as a people give over the rearing of our kids to educators. Let me tell you, I never did and I never will. I know that I am much more equipped to teach my children everything they need to know academically than any teacher they will have in their pre-collegiate years. What I can't give them at home is the social aspect of being in school and that is why I send them to school. I also don't believe that our educational system is lagging behind that in other countries. I believe that we give every child a chance at an education and that our "test" scores represent that ideal. Many of the countries that we are being compared with only educate their brightest. Kids are separated at a young age into the educational track, the sports track, the vocational track, etc. So we are only seeing the test results of their top performers since they are the only ones being given that education. If you compared our top 10 or 20 percent to their results I bet you we would fare just fine.
In addition, what is really the goal of education? In my opinion it is to produce people who will excel in the workforce. We need to foster creativity and critical thinking and thinking outside the box so we end up with a workforce that is competent and inventive and groundbreaking. We need to produce young adults who can think for themselves and sove the problems that society and businesses face.
What is the goal of educators? To have a job and as such they create problems where there aren't any so that they have something to fix. New math? Give me a break. Math is math. There is one right answer and there are often many ways to solve any given problem. So why do educators keep changing the way that teachers are supposed to teach math, and why, if a child solves a problem correctly but using a different method are they counted wrong? Is a successful workforce made up of robots who all do the same thing? NO, NO, NO. A successful workforce is made up of creative thinkers who find a better way to solve a problem.
I have so much to say on this topic that I will definitely be revisiting it from time to time. For today, I have to get back to making sure I equip my children with the critical thinking skills and the tools they will need to really be successful in life. Not the cookie cutter, standardized testing education they currently get in school.
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
Shelves Above DS's Desk
Along with a new school year, comes the beginning of a whole new year of homework. I was observing my ds (dear son) at work the other day and was again reminded of how messy his desk had become. It was time I did something about it. So, I hatched a plan to put up some shelves above his desk to store all that junk currently residing on the desk (of course I know that once the current junk finds a home, ds will find a whole new batch of stuff to put on his desk -- mainly Star Wars lego models).
First I decided how deep I wanted the shelves to be. I decided to make the lowest shelf a bit narrower (8.5 inches) than the other two (12.5 inches) so that it would not encroach on his workspace. The shelves length was constrained by the adjoining wall and the window placement to 24 inches. A trip to the local hardware store (Home Depot) netted brackets to hold up the shelves and some MDF to make the shelves themselves. I also wanted the shelves to look a bit more substantial so I decided to edge the MDF with some scrap wood we had lying around the garage.
The theme of my son's room is planes and fighter jets, so I wanted the brackets to be silver. Of course the ones I liked only came in black, so I spray painted them silver using Rust-oleum primer and paint (Painter's Touch 2x). My preparation and painting method is as follows. First I scuff sanded (ok, dh (dear hubby) did this) the metal brackets. Next I applied two coats of Rust-oleum spray primer. After letting the primer completely dry, I wet sanded the brackets with 600 grit wet sandpaper to smooth out the primer coat. It is important to use a special sandpaper made for wet sanding since regular sandpaper would just disintegrate if you got it wet. Also, while wet sanding you need to keep the piece you are sanding wet by either dunking it in a bucket of water or spritzing it with a spray bottle periodically.
Two coats of silver spray paint (Metallic aluminum) finished the job.
After cutting the MDF down to the sizes needed for the shelves, I primed them using KILZ primer and then painted them Behr Ultra Pure White Semi-gloss. I like to use semi-gloss on furniture and shelving because it is more durable and easy to wipe clean.
Since I wanted the shelves to seem more substantial than 3/4 inch MDF I edged 3 sides of each shelf with 1x2 fir strips, mitering the corners. After cutting all the pieces to length (remember to add the additional length needed for the 45 degree miter cuts) I prepainted them with Behr paint plus primer in a dark blue called Starless Night. We attached the edging to the shelves using small brad nails. I filled the nail holes with wood filler, let dry, and touched up.
Finally, we installed the brackets and shelves. Wow! Ds's desk is now clutter free (at least for a few days). This space is still a work in progress. My next project is a DIY magnetic white board (did you know you can buy white board paint?) for the striped wall above the desk to hold the weekly spelling list and for me to leave reminders and notes on.
Now, if only he would let me paint his room a light grey (it doesn't get enough natural light for this deep of a color, but he picked it out two years ago and loves it), paint the "chair rail" white, and paint just the wall below the rail and behind the bed dark blue, I think the room would be perfect and would really grow with him as he grows. I'll let you know how good my powers of persuasion are.
The Project Results: Close up of new shelving
First I decided how deep I wanted the shelves to be. I decided to make the lowest shelf a bit narrower (8.5 inches) than the other two (12.5 inches) so that it would not encroach on his workspace. The shelves length was constrained by the adjoining wall and the window placement to 24 inches. A trip to the local hardware store (Home Depot) netted brackets to hold up the shelves and some MDF to make the shelves themselves. I also wanted the shelves to look a bit more substantial so I decided to edge the MDF with some scrap wood we had lying around the garage.
The theme of my son's room is planes and fighter jets, so I wanted the brackets to be silver. Of course the ones I liked only came in black, so I spray painted them silver using Rust-oleum primer and paint (Painter's Touch 2x). My preparation and painting method is as follows. First I scuff sanded (ok, dh (dear hubby) did this) the metal brackets. Next I applied two coats of Rust-oleum spray primer. After letting the primer completely dry, I wet sanded the brackets with 600 grit wet sandpaper to smooth out the primer coat. It is important to use a special sandpaper made for wet sanding since regular sandpaper would just disintegrate if you got it wet. Also, while wet sanding you need to keep the piece you are sanding wet by either dunking it in a bucket of water or spritzing it with a spray bottle periodically.
Brackets in spray box spray primed
Two coats of silver spray paint (Metallic aluminum) finished the job.
Brackets in spray box painted silver
Close up of brackets spray painted silver
After cutting the MDF down to the sizes needed for the shelves, I primed them using KILZ primer and then painted them Behr Ultra Pure White Semi-gloss. I like to use semi-gloss on furniture and shelving because it is more durable and easy to wipe clean.
Since I wanted the shelves to seem more substantial than 3/4 inch MDF I edged 3 sides of each shelf with 1x2 fir strips, mitering the corners. After cutting all the pieces to length (remember to add the additional length needed for the 45 degree miter cuts) I prepainted them with Behr paint plus primer in a dark blue called Starless Night. We attached the edging to the shelves using small brad nails. I filled the nail holes with wood filler, let dry, and touched up.
Shelves painted, edged, and nail holes filled
Finally, we installed the brackets and shelves. Wow! Ds's desk is now clutter free (at least for a few days). This space is still a work in progress. My next project is a DIY magnetic white board (did you know you can buy white board paint?) for the striped wall above the desk to hold the weekly spelling list and for me to leave reminders and notes on.
Before: Cluttered desk space (This was on a good day when I had picked it up and put things away).
After: Cleaner desk workspace
Now, if only he would let me paint his room a light grey (it doesn't get enough natural light for this deep of a color, but he picked it out two years ago and loves it), paint the "chair rail" white, and paint just the wall below the rail and behind the bed dark blue, I think the room would be perfect and would really grow with him as he grows. I'll let you know how good my powers of persuasion are.
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Refinishing (and Finishing) Furniture
Anyone who reads this blog has probably finished or refinished a piece of furniture at some point in their life. It is one of the most rewarding projects that you can do. It just feels fantastic when you take something that is old and worn or beloved and you strip it down and then refinish it to shiny newness. I dream about finding an amazing hutch at a garage sale or flea market, haggling to get a great price, and then taking it home to refinish and put in my stair vestibule. I am still looking for that perfect piece.
It was about a month before last Christmas, we had moved back into our newly remodeled home and I was sitting at our informal dining table when I realized that it just didn't fit in with the new house. I loved the old thing (it was one of the first purchases that my husband made when he moved here after grad school) and it had great shape, but it was finished in a light stain that just screamed country, and the new house was definitely more beachy modern. One big problem was the chairs. While they were fully functional, they were just ordinary looking and boring and not the look I wanted in our new home. So, I sold them in a garage sale to a young man who was just getting his first apartment.
Around this time I saw these pictures in a Pottery Barn catalog and knew that was the look I wanted and I needed those chairs. They were a bit of a splurge, but hubby made them my Christmas present. Hooray for me. We even got one of the six I wanted for free with a bonus bucks deal (which resulted in me getting the last chair a few days after Christmas -- as soon as the bonus bucks could be used).
However, the table needed some work. Out to the garage it went. We started by using stripper, to get the poly off the top of the table. It took three applications (and next time I want to try citristrip since I've heard it works really well) and a bit of scraping to get it all off. Next my husband sanded it down to get all the old stain out. I would say he did a three part sanding, going up in grit from a 100 to a 250 (I think). We didn't bother stripping the legs and apron of the table since I knew that I was going to paint this part white. We did clean it all really well and then sanded so the primer would have something to hold on to. I then restained the top of the table a deeper brown (Minwax English Chestnut or was it Special Walnut? -- of course I didn't write it down. I just stained some test pieces and decided which color I thought matched the chair legs the best). Two coats of stain and the table top was ready for three coats of polyurethane. Between each coat we sanded smooth. Finally, I taped off the table top from the apron and legs and primed and painted. One coat of primer and two coats of Behr Swiss Coffee in semi-gloss later and I had the perfect (the top looks great with the chair legs), newly refinished informal, everyday dining table for our great room.
(Of course the whole refinishing project ended up being more expensive than anticipated because without the table under the light, super tall hubby banged his head on the light and broke the glass. So we had to order a new glass piece (luckily it wasn't too expensive and way less than a whole new table).
It was about a month before last Christmas, we had moved back into our newly remodeled home and I was sitting at our informal dining table when I realized that it just didn't fit in with the new house. I loved the old thing (it was one of the first purchases that my husband made when he moved here after grad school) and it had great shape, but it was finished in a light stain that just screamed country, and the new house was definitely more beachy modern. One big problem was the chairs. While they were fully functional, they were just ordinary looking and boring and not the look I wanted in our new home. So, I sold them in a garage sale to a young man who was just getting his first apartment.
Original table and chairs
Around this time I saw these pictures in a Pottery Barn catalog and knew that was the look I wanted and I needed those chairs. They were a bit of a splurge, but hubby made them my Christmas present. Hooray for me. We even got one of the six I wanted for free with a bonus bucks deal (which resulted in me getting the last chair a few days after Christmas -- as soon as the bonus bucks could be used).
Pottery Barn chairs with two toned table (Image from PotteryBarn.com)
Pottery Barn chairs paired with a table similar in style to our table (Image from PotteryBarn.com)
However, the table needed some work. Out to the garage it went. We started by using stripper, to get the poly off the top of the table. It took three applications (and next time I want to try citristrip since I've heard it works really well) and a bit of scraping to get it all off. Next my husband sanded it down to get all the old stain out. I would say he did a three part sanding, going up in grit from a 100 to a 250 (I think). We didn't bother stripping the legs and apron of the table since I knew that I was going to paint this part white. We did clean it all really well and then sanded so the primer would have something to hold on to. I then restained the top of the table a deeper brown (Minwax English Chestnut or was it Special Walnut? -- of course I didn't write it down. I just stained some test pieces and decided which color I thought matched the chair legs the best). Two coats of stain and the table top was ready for three coats of polyurethane. Between each coat we sanded smooth. Finally, I taped off the table top from the apron and legs and primed and painted. One coat of primer and two coats of Behr Swiss Coffee in semi-gloss later and I had the perfect (the top looks great with the chair legs), newly refinished informal, everyday dining table for our great room.
Our refinished table with new chairs
(Of course the whole refinishing project ended up being more expensive than anticipated because without the table under the light, super tall hubby banged his head on the light and broke the glass. So we had to order a new glass piece (luckily it wasn't too expensive and way less than a whole new table).
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Framing Prints, Pictures and Art
I know I said I was going to do a series on decorating our newly renovated house (and I still plan to do this once the kids are back in school) but I was just looking around the house today and realized that something that can really make a house stand out is its art. And it doesn't have to be expensive art. Much of what I have hanging in our house was either done by me, or is framed prints and photos. Lately, I have been experimenting with brightly colored mats. My inspirations were these pictures out of Better Homes and Gardens and (of course) one that I can't find in my archives right now.
And here is how I interpreted this in my own home.
I'd had this bright turquoise matt board for a long time (I just bought it because I loved the color) and so I decided to punch up this display with a little color. I still need to find just the right piece or pieces of art to hang above the bookcase. It is a very large and high wall so I feel like I need something quite substantial here.
We've had this print for a long time. I think the darker matt really pulls the eye into the print. Like most of the house, this area is another work in progress. I have been looking for a sideboard type piece to fit under the picture. It needs to be deep enough to store all the myriad games we have. I can't wait to find the right piece so that I can refinish it to be just what I want, but that's a different post.
In the dining room I matted cooking photos in different tones of green.
I got the idea to do two wider matts from this inspiration photo from Better Homes and Gardens. I loved the two toned wide blue matts. (OK, I also love the floor to ceiling bookcases. I want to do this in my office/study someday soon) I interpreted this with an off white outer and light green inner matt. Eventually I might change out the outer matt for another shade of green.
In the guest room, I added some color in the bright yellow matts around photos of the kids with their grandparents. Someday I'll post about how I try to make our guest room inviting and comfortable for guests. The impressionist style painting was done for me as a Christmas gift from one of my uncles. The colors were perfect for this room.
I am blessed with a very artistic family and like to include their artwork in my home. I have a watercolor done by my mom hanging in the hallway right when you come into the house from the garage. SInce the garage is our main family entrance, I thought this would be the perfect place to hang this inspiring scene from the Napa Valley.
Upstairs, in the master suite I painted and hung an oversized painting of a flower. I painted this on a thin piece of plywood (I got this idea from David Bromstad of Color Splash). You don't have to go out and spend a lot of money on canvas to make fun art for your house. I think the plywood cost me about $5 at Home Depot (and I only used half the sheet). I also painted a scene on the back of it, so if we get tired of the flower we can just turn it around.
Upstairs, in my boys rooms, I covered matts with scraps of fabric I had lying around the house that coordinate with their room colors. Some ribbon adds a little interest to these matts.
Anyway, I guess the whole point of this post is that artwork and photos really add life to a home, and the way you matt these pieces can really make them stand out. A simple matt can take a stock poster or print from ho-hum to special and fantastic. And it doesn't have to cost a lot of money. You can make a matt out of a piece of colored cardboard, or cover a corregated cardboard matt with fabric scraps (or just leave it and use the corregated texture). Craft paint can make a white matt into any color you want. Just have fun and make your house beautiful.
p.s. Here's another inspiration photo of mine from Family Circle magazine. I love the bright, skinny frames. I haven't done this yet, but I am looking for a place in my home where something like this would work.
Inspiration: Wide, light blue matts from Better Homes and Gardens
Inspiration: Wide pink matts from Better Homes and Gardens
And here is how I interpreted this in my own home.
Add a pop of color in your matts
dark and bright matts
I'd had this bright turquoise matt board for a long time (I just bought it because I loved the color) and so I decided to punch up this display with a little color. I still need to find just the right piece or pieces of art to hang above the bookcase. It is a very large and high wall so I feel like I need something quite substantial here.
Vestibule at the bottom of the stairs (I need to find the right piece to go under this picture)
We've had this print for a long time. I think the darker matt really pulls the eye into the print. Like most of the house, this area is another work in progress. I have been looking for a sideboard type piece to fit under the picture. It needs to be deep enough to store all the myriad games we have. I can't wait to find the right piece so that I can refinish it to be just what I want, but that's a different post.
In the dining room I matted cooking photos in different tones of green.
Using two wide matts (at least 1" reveals)
I got the idea to do two wider matts from this inspiration photo from Better Homes and Gardens. I loved the two toned wide blue matts. (OK, I also love the floor to ceiling bookcases. I want to do this in my office/study someday soon) I interpreted this with an off white outer and light green inner matt. Eventually I might change out the outer matt for another shade of green.
Inspiration: wide two tone double blue matts from Better Homes and Gardens
In the guest room, I added some color in the bright yellow matts around photos of the kids with their grandparents. Someday I'll post about how I try to make our guest room inviting and comfortable for guests. The impressionist style painting was done for me as a Christmas gift from one of my uncles. The colors were perfect for this room.
Using a bright yellow matt to highlight a photo
I am blessed with a very artistic family and like to include their artwork in my home. I have a watercolor done by my mom hanging in the hallway right when you come into the house from the garage. SInce the garage is our main family entrance, I thought this would be the perfect place to hang this inspiring scene from the Napa Valley.
Upstairs, in the master suite I painted and hung an oversized painting of a flower. I painted this on a thin piece of plywood (I got this idea from David Bromstad of Color Splash). You don't have to go out and spend a lot of money on canvas to make fun art for your house. I think the plywood cost me about $5 at Home Depot (and I only used half the sheet). I also painted a scene on the back of it, so if we get tired of the flower we can just turn it around.
Upstairs, in my boys rooms, I covered matts with scraps of fabric I had lying around the house that coordinate with their room colors. Some ribbon adds a little interest to these matts.
Anyway, I guess the whole point of this post is that artwork and photos really add life to a home, and the way you matt these pieces can really make them stand out. A simple matt can take a stock poster or print from ho-hum to special and fantastic. And it doesn't have to cost a lot of money. You can make a matt out of a piece of colored cardboard, or cover a corregated cardboard matt with fabric scraps (or just leave it and use the corregated texture). Craft paint can make a white matt into any color you want. Just have fun and make your house beautiful.
p.s. Here's another inspiration photo of mine from Family Circle magazine. I love the bright, skinny frames. I haven't done this yet, but I am looking for a place in my home where something like this would work.
Inspiration: Colored frames with white matts from Family Circle
Friday, July 23, 2010
Where Do They Find ...
Have you ever been watching one of those decorating shows on HGTV or TLC and they show you the designer going to all these great antique shows or flea markets or great second hand consignment shops? Well, I was watching one of my new favorite shows Sarah's House and she always finds the greatest antique/flea markets. How do Sarah and her assistant Tommy (aside: I love Tommy. He is so funny.) find these places and can they tell me where to find one in my area? On all these shows they always find these terrific items for pennies. Lets see, the last few things Sarah has found include a gorgeous four poster bed (wouldn't go with my house, but it was beautiful and fit perfectly on the farmhouse she was renovating) and hand quilted antique bedspread. They found a dining table and in passing I saw some random person who happened to be in the background find the perfect dresser that would have looked terrific in my stair vestibule. It was just the piece that I have been looking for for the past year. Oh my, I wanted that piece.
All the flea markets and such that I have found in my area, are really just junk sales or professionals trying to sell t-shirts and mass produced items. They are nowhere near the quality of the sales that you see on these shows. And I know that you need to wade through a lot of junk to just find the diamond among all the zirconia, but really, these places near me are more cheap clothing and such and not old furniture pieces.
Hey Sarah, can you find me some great flea markets in California?
Decorating My House
About a year ago we finished the remodel on our house. What started out as a kitchen remodel (the house had a tiny 9x9ish kitchen) ended up as a whole house remodel. In the end there were only 4 rooms in the whole house that weren't extensively remodeled (and event those got all new windows and trim to match the rest of the house and the upstairs hall bathroom is slated for a remodel within the next year). The upside to all this is that we now have the house of our dreams that we hope to be in for at least the next 20 years.
This also meant that I get to redecorate almost an entire house. It is still a work in progress and there are a lot of things that I still want to do, but for the most part I am happy with the way the house is coming along. I hope to do a series of entries about decorating the house and how I chose where to splurge and where to bargain shop.
So where do I invest? Like in building the house, I spend the money on the parts that will be touched and used every day. In a house this is on the doorknobs and pulls, the light switches, and the appliances. For decorating this is in the big upholstered pieces and the main eating area chairs and tables.
It is in the accessories that I save. My biggest source of great accessories at super cheap prices is TJMaxx/HomeGoods. I love HomeGoods. My biggest finds there are pottery and vases and table lamps. When I post about my bedroom you'll see what I mean.
So, over the next few weeks, I'm going to go room by room and talk about how I've decorated, what I like and dislike so far, and what I am still looking to do. There are a lot of places where I haven't found just the right thing yet, but I am always looking. One thing that I stress when decorating, is to take your time. Nothing (except maybe a bed) is needed right away. Wait until you find that perfect piece of art or just the right table. It is ok if your space has an empty wall for a while. But at the same time, be ready to make the purchase when you find just the right piece.
This also meant that I get to redecorate almost an entire house. It is still a work in progress and there are a lot of things that I still want to do, but for the most part I am happy with the way the house is coming along. I hope to do a series of entries about decorating the house and how I chose where to splurge and where to bargain shop.
So where do I invest? Like in building the house, I spend the money on the parts that will be touched and used every day. In a house this is on the doorknobs and pulls, the light switches, and the appliances. For decorating this is in the big upholstered pieces and the main eating area chairs and tables.
It is in the accessories that I save. My biggest source of great accessories at super cheap prices is TJMaxx/HomeGoods. I love HomeGoods. My biggest finds there are pottery and vases and table lamps. When I post about my bedroom you'll see what I mean.
So, over the next few weeks, I'm going to go room by room and talk about how I've decorated, what I like and dislike so far, and what I am still looking to do. There are a lot of places where I haven't found just the right thing yet, but I am always looking. One thing that I stress when decorating, is to take your time. Nothing (except maybe a bed) is needed right away. Wait until you find that perfect piece of art or just the right table. It is ok if your space has an empty wall for a while. But at the same time, be ready to make the purchase when you find just the right piece.
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
I Love Decorating Shows
I love to decorate my house and get inspiration everywhere. I love watching decorating shows on HGTV and reading decorating blogs here on the web. Some of my favorite blogs are Thrifty Decor Chick and Nesting Place. Some of my favorite HGTV shows are Devine Design, Color Splash, and Design Star. This blog post is going to be mostly about this season of Design Star (I'll post more about my decorating and inspirations and such later).
I wasn't even going to watch Design Star this season after the debacle that was Antonio last season. He did not deserve to win. Especially given his final challenge. It was just so horrible that I couldn't believe he won. It really made me question the design taste of the judges. I was so upset that I was ready to give up on Devine Design also because I had lost all faith in Candace Olson. But, then I thought that the only way that Antonio could win was because the powers that be wanted him to win and so pressured the judges to pick him (at least that is how I am rationalizing the judges totally wrong choice to myself).
But anyway, I never told the DVR to not record Design Star so it started recording it this season and I took a chance and started watching it again. I have to say, that I don't think that this crop of contestants is as talented as the ones on the previous seasons. I have not been impressed with any of their designs yet.
But what I really have a problem with is the format of the show and the way the judges are very mean this season. I know that they need to make sure that they choose someone who can handle a show of their own, but I think none of them realize the almost impossible tasks they are giving the contestants. How good of a design could they come up with and implement in just two to three days. The logistics are almost impossible -- come up with a design, order and receive the furniture you need within a day, paint and do carpentry (all by yourselves not with a crew and carpenter to help), and then put the whole thing together in a total of 2-3 days. I mean really, when have any of the three judges (Genevieve, Vern, or Candace) ever done this themselves, and then they are commenting on when things aren't perfect. Candace has never to my knowledge done something like this with these constraints. Even Vern and Genevieve when they were on Trading Spaces had a plan before they went in, had chosen most of the furniture beforehand, had design drawings of builds and carpenters to build everything, and then had 2 days to simply implement things. So, what they are asking these contestants to do is really, very very different and much harder.
How would I change things? I want to know that the judges can do what they are asking the contestants to do. Let's see them tackle at least some of the challenges like the contestants do. Another thing I would like to see is the judges fix a design when they don't like it. For instance, this past week the challenge was to design a space for a New York fire station. The judges ripped one of the teams to shreds. I have to say, that I agreed with much of what they said about the design and would certainly concede that the part that I disagreed with may have looked much different in person than it did on tv. However, what would have made the show really interesting would have been to see the three judges go in to this space and fix it. They could have been given the same time frame and redesigned the space (especially since this was for real clients who are so very deserving). Now THAT I would have loved to see. Hey, HGTV -- just think about this idea!
I wasn't even going to watch Design Star this season after the debacle that was Antonio last season. He did not deserve to win. Especially given his final challenge. It was just so horrible that I couldn't believe he won. It really made me question the design taste of the judges. I was so upset that I was ready to give up on Devine Design also because I had lost all faith in Candace Olson. But, then I thought that the only way that Antonio could win was because the powers that be wanted him to win and so pressured the judges to pick him (at least that is how I am rationalizing the judges totally wrong choice to myself).
But anyway, I never told the DVR to not record Design Star so it started recording it this season and I took a chance and started watching it again. I have to say, that I don't think that this crop of contestants is as talented as the ones on the previous seasons. I have not been impressed with any of their designs yet.
But what I really have a problem with is the format of the show and the way the judges are very mean this season. I know that they need to make sure that they choose someone who can handle a show of their own, but I think none of them realize the almost impossible tasks they are giving the contestants. How good of a design could they come up with and implement in just two to three days. The logistics are almost impossible -- come up with a design, order and receive the furniture you need within a day, paint and do carpentry (all by yourselves not with a crew and carpenter to help), and then put the whole thing together in a total of 2-3 days. I mean really, when have any of the three judges (Genevieve, Vern, or Candace) ever done this themselves, and then they are commenting on when things aren't perfect. Candace has never to my knowledge done something like this with these constraints. Even Vern and Genevieve when they were on Trading Spaces had a plan before they went in, had chosen most of the furniture beforehand, had design drawings of builds and carpenters to build everything, and then had 2 days to simply implement things. So, what they are asking these contestants to do is really, very very different and much harder.
How would I change things? I want to know that the judges can do what they are asking the contestants to do. Let's see them tackle at least some of the challenges like the contestants do. Another thing I would like to see is the judges fix a design when they don't like it. For instance, this past week the challenge was to design a space for a New York fire station. The judges ripped one of the teams to shreds. I have to say, that I agreed with much of what they said about the design and would certainly concede that the part that I disagreed with may have looked much different in person than it did on tv. However, what would have made the show really interesting would have been to see the three judges go in to this space and fix it. They could have been given the same time frame and redesigned the space (especially since this was for real clients who are so very deserving). Now THAT I would have loved to see. Hey, HGTV -- just think about this idea!
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Parents and Happiness
I read an interesting article on parents and happiness yesterday. Basically it stated that people with kids are less happy that childless people. It also claimed that people with kids will deny this and say that these types of studies (although there have been many that have come up with the same results) are wrong. After reading the article I can understand how and why the results of these studies say that parents are more unhappy than non-parents. But I am not sure that I agree with their definition of happy (and much to my surprise the author of this article also pointed out this possibility).
If happiness is defined as doing what you want whenever you want, then of course people who don't have children are going to be considered happier. When you are a parent your focus shifts from yourself to your children. You tend to do for them rather than for yourself. Especially when they are young, they aren't able to take care of themselves. In those early years it is a parents job to teach them how to be self sufficient, how to care about other people, basically how to be a productive member of society. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to realize that in the moment happiness is put off for parents.
Modern society has also made it more likely that today's parents are less happy, especially mothers. Today, if you aren't out in the workforce, people look down on you. They give lip service to how great it is that you are staying at home to care for your child, but then in the same sentence they ask if you are going back to work once the kids are in school. That's quite the mixed message. Today when a woman chooses not to work she is looked at as if something is wrong with her. As a woman with a PhD in Computer Science I have heard countless times how I am letting women down by not working. How it is my duty to go out and get a job or I am setting women back everywhere. My reply to this is that, in fact I am advancing women because I am making a choice and not being forced to do what I don't want to do. Women fought to have the choices they have today, they didn't fight to be forced to work.
I also think parents today often think they have to be perfect. They are pressured into signing their kids up for every activity that comes along or else they are told that they are putting their kids at a disadvantage for future success. On countless message boards moms and dads are discussing getting personal trainers and signing their kids up for private lessons so that they can get a scholarship to college (and these are 6 and 7 year old kids we are talking about). No wonder parents say they are unhappy. They are taking all the pressure for getting their 6 year old into college.
It isn't their job or even possible for them to get their child into college. A parent's job is to help their children grow and learn. It is to teach them how to become self sufficient and to give them the tools they will need to make their own life choices whether that be to attend college, go into the military, or learn a trade skill. Of course all parents have dreams and hopes for their kids (I hope mine will choose to attend college and I will and do encourage them in this direction), but ultimately it is up to the child what they do with their life. All I can do is give my kids the tools to make the best decisions for themselves.
People are so worried about little Johnny getting a football scholarship. I mean really no one can tell at 7 if a kid is going to be good enough to get a scholarship. And besides, if Johnny is really that athletically inclined it isn't going to matter if he doesn't get a personal trainer now. A person who is that good is going to be that good no matter what (if they decide that is what they want to do).
As parents we need to let kids be kids, like our parents did. Our parents didn't feel the need to entertain us every waking hour. They said "go outside and play" or "you have toys, go play with them" or "go read a book." My mom wasn't my playmate (don't get me wrong she certainly played with us), she was my mom.
I think parenting isn't about being happy all the time. It is about becoming a more complete person; perhaps even a better person. It forces you to be a more selfless person and to realize that sometimes you need to put someone else above yourself. For me, I believe that I have a better, more fulfilling life, as a mother. When I stop and really think about my life and what I want, I realize that I have exactly what I want and that makes me happy. But when I get caught up in outside views (or I am in the middle of handling a sick kid) then I start to question myself. So really, parenting is teaching me how to be a more confident person. It is teaching me how to be a more fulfilled, well rounded, happier person.
If happiness is defined as doing what you want whenever you want, then of course people who don't have children are going to be considered happier. When you are a parent your focus shifts from yourself to your children. You tend to do for them rather than for yourself. Especially when they are young, they aren't able to take care of themselves. In those early years it is a parents job to teach them how to be self sufficient, how to care about other people, basically how to be a productive member of society. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to realize that in the moment happiness is put off for parents.
Modern society has also made it more likely that today's parents are less happy, especially mothers. Today, if you aren't out in the workforce, people look down on you. They give lip service to how great it is that you are staying at home to care for your child, but then in the same sentence they ask if you are going back to work once the kids are in school. That's quite the mixed message. Today when a woman chooses not to work she is looked at as if something is wrong with her. As a woman with a PhD in Computer Science I have heard countless times how I am letting women down by not working. How it is my duty to go out and get a job or I am setting women back everywhere. My reply to this is that, in fact I am advancing women because I am making a choice and not being forced to do what I don't want to do. Women fought to have the choices they have today, they didn't fight to be forced to work.
I also think parents today often think they have to be perfect. They are pressured into signing their kids up for every activity that comes along or else they are told that they are putting their kids at a disadvantage for future success. On countless message boards moms and dads are discussing getting personal trainers and signing their kids up for private lessons so that they can get a scholarship to college (and these are 6 and 7 year old kids we are talking about). No wonder parents say they are unhappy. They are taking all the pressure for getting their 6 year old into college.
It isn't their job or even possible for them to get their child into college. A parent's job is to help their children grow and learn. It is to teach them how to become self sufficient and to give them the tools they will need to make their own life choices whether that be to attend college, go into the military, or learn a trade skill. Of course all parents have dreams and hopes for their kids (I hope mine will choose to attend college and I will and do encourage them in this direction), but ultimately it is up to the child what they do with their life. All I can do is give my kids the tools to make the best decisions for themselves.
People are so worried about little Johnny getting a football scholarship. I mean really no one can tell at 7 if a kid is going to be good enough to get a scholarship. And besides, if Johnny is really that athletically inclined it isn't going to matter if he doesn't get a personal trainer now. A person who is that good is going to be that good no matter what (if they decide that is what they want to do).
As parents we need to let kids be kids, like our parents did. Our parents didn't feel the need to entertain us every waking hour. They said "go outside and play" or "you have toys, go play with them" or "go read a book." My mom wasn't my playmate (don't get me wrong she certainly played with us), she was my mom.
I think parenting isn't about being happy all the time. It is about becoming a more complete person; perhaps even a better person. It forces you to be a more selfless person and to realize that sometimes you need to put someone else above yourself. For me, I believe that I have a better, more fulfilling life, as a mother. When I stop and really think about my life and what I want, I realize that I have exactly what I want and that makes me happy. But when I get caught up in outside views (or I am in the middle of handling a sick kid) then I start to question myself. So really, parenting is teaching me how to be a more confident person. It is teaching me how to be a more fulfilled, well rounded, happier person.
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
About Being a Mom and Life Goals
I’ve been a mom for a while now and I really love it. I would never change the decision we made for me to leave the workforce. I truly feel there is nothing as important for our family and our boys than for me to be here for them. But sometimes I worry about what they are going to think of me as they are growing up. And sometimes I think that I spent over 23 years going to school and got my PhD in Computer Science and now I am a "stay at home mom". I question if I wasted all that time. Luckily, in my chosen field, I didn’t go into debt with all my schooling. I was lucky and all my graduate schooling was paid for by the institution I went to plus I was salaried as a teaching assistant and then as a research assistant. I will always be proud of accomplishing my PhD and of the research I did for my PhD. There are days when I would like to continue my research in automatic computer generated information representation. I loved the work and really feel that I contributed to the field. At the same time, I feel like all my work and schooling is allowing me to be a better mother to my two wonderful boys. I have a breath and depth of knowledge that will help me raise them and help them throughout their lives. I will always be able to help them with their homework. I don’t have to worry about them outpacing me by the time they are in fourth grade. It will sound selfish, but I don’t want my boys to look at me like “why don’t you do anything?” or to not realize that I am a very intelligent, smart woman who made the choice to stay home and put all my intelligence into raising two boys to become happy, productive, terrific men.
I get this question a lot: “Are you going to go back to work after the boys are in school?” Of course, I could go back to work. I have the intelligence and the credentials. But do I want to? At this point, my gut feeling is not full time. Yes, I will need something to take up some of those hours when the boys are in school, but I feel that it may be even more important for me to be home for them then than it is now. Once they are in school, they will be subject to much more peer pressure and peer interaction than they are now. We all know that learning to deal with peers without Mommy or Daddy around is very important. But how do they learn how to deal with those situations if they can’t come home and talk to us about that. I don’t know about everyone else, but I was much more likely to talk to mom right when I got home from school (when things were fresh in my mind) than hours later. There will be so many new issues for the boys to deal with, things that are much more emotionally complicated than there are now, and I just feel like it will be invaluable to them to have me at home when they get home. Or even to have me at home if they accidentally forget a piece of important homework or the field trip form. And I think about puberty; all those changes, both physically and emotionally. I know that when I was growing up, it was extremely nice to know that mom was at home and would always be there if I needed her. I want to give that same feeling to my boys. Also, I believe that if a parent is at home that kids are less likely to get into trouble after school. And there are so many things these days for kids to get into and ways for kids to get themselves in trouble I want to do everything I can to help them through those troubling and confusing years. For us that includes having a parent at home.
So, what will I do with those free hours. Right now I volunteer as a tutor one morning a week while my husband stays home with the boys (more on how this benefits our family later). I would really like to do this more once the boys are in school. Right now I tutor young women who are single and pregnant and women who have had really tough lives (poor home situations growing up, drug abuse, physical abuse, criminal activities, etc). For many, we get them ready to take the test to get their GEDs, others we work with to get ready for community college or to enter the workforce. My speciality is math (apparently it is hard to find competent math tutors in this type of situation) although I will tutor in whatever subject is needed. I find that most of the young women believe that they can not do math; that they are bad at it. I try to instill in each girl that she can do it, that math doesn’t have to be hard. I love being a tutor. I love trying to think of one more way to explain a concept so that my student will “get it.” It feels amazing when you have been working with a student and then you see the light bulb go on in their head and they look at you and say “but that is so easy.” That is when I know that I am doing my job well. So, I think that I will probably tutor more often once both boys are in school.
I would also like to volunteer at my sons’ schools. It is appalling how little we give to our school systems. Obviously, I have an extensive background in computer programming. I could volunteer my time in a computer lab or even in the office doing all those little administrative things (like copying and filing, etc) that are needed to allow the teachers to spend their precious time teaching our kids.
I also have thought about doing freelance work or part time teaching at a community college. I could tutor in a variety of subjects, most probably in computer science or math. I could do freelance website design and upkeep. I have dabbled in real estate website design and that looks promising as more and more buyers and sellers are utilizing the web.
I would also like to design a beginning computer programming course. I have taken and TA’d my share of beginning and upper level programming courses and have experienced great courses and horrible courses. I would like to design a course template, complete with text (probably a web textbook) and course projects. I have found that the beginning level courses are the most lacking and yet contain the fundamentals upon which all future programming courses are based. We need to give our young students a good basis (sound programming practices as well as a basic knowledge of programming structures) from which they can advance and innovate. There have been too many incredibly bright students who have been turned off to programming because these first level courses are boring and inadequately taught. It isn’t glamorous to teach students how to use for loops. It isn’t groundbreaking research to write a program that outputs “Hello World” to the monitor. But why should our first level courses be composed of writing a five line program that outputs “Hello World”? We need to show our students what they can make a computer do. We can design projects that aren’t mind numbing, yet aren’t too complicated for the beginning programmer. We can design projects that will allow those who are truly interested to go farther and explore deeper while at the same time be appropriate for those who need a little more help or need a little more time to truly understand the power of programming. These are my goals for a course that I hope to be able to design once both my children are in school.
It's My Life
I'm starting this blog mainly to have a place to write down my thoughts about life and the things going on around me. There is no particular area that I plan on discussing. This isn't a cooking blog, or a decorating blog, or a kids blog. It will probably be a combination of all of these and much more. I'm not a great writer, so don't expect a great work of literature. These are just my thoughts on what is happening to me. It's my life. Enjoy!
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